Do Not Attempt This At Home

When I last left you we were T-Minus minutes away from heading to the airport. We were ready to go with time to spare. 

As we walked out of the house I stopped and did a “Should I or Shouldn’t I”. I opted for the “shouldn’t I” and off we went.  Bad call on my part.

We got to the airport, parked the truck in long term parking, got the shuttle to the terminal we were on our way.

We stepped up to the counter to check-in, Hubs pulled out his wallet, lost all color in his face and said to me “I don’t have a picture ID”.  I of course thought he was kidding. Yeah, not so much.  It was 7:30. Our flight was at 9:10, it would take 45 mins one way to go home.  It wasn’t going to happen. The girl checking our bags mumbled something and sent us on to security.

I walked up to the counter first and told the T*S*A* guy I had my ID but Hubs didn’t and was there anything we could do?  “Well Ma’am, he can fly but were gonna have to put him in the book and call Washington”. I laughed because really? Call Washington? Mr. T*S*A* laughed because he so wasn’t kidding.  Mr. T told me I could go ahead and go on. I told him I would just wait for Hubs. 

True to his word Mr. T called for a Supervisor. Over walked Mrs. T*S*A* with a cell phone and a book.  Hubs showed her his debit card with his name on it and his social security card. She asked him a few questions, scribbled his name down, wrote all over his boarding pass and put a few funky shaped hole punches in it and sent us on through the x-ray / scanner machines.

He of course was immediately pulled aside and searched. And I don’t mean a nice little once over.  He was patted down several times. I am not sure even I know him that well ;). Then they collected his bin with his shoes etc. in it and used a great big Q-tip to swab everything and stuck the Q-tip into a machine.  After a few minutes Mrs. T walked over , snapped her phone shut and said he was good to go.

All of this before 8:00 a.m. and guess what? I really never even lost my shit, and boy howdy do I come from a long line of shit loosers too.  Everyone who has heard the story were shocked to learn that I was as cool as a cucumber through it all.

After we claimed our carry ons and Hubs claimed back his dignity I called my mother (who is never going to let us hear the end of it) and asked her to go to our house, find his passport and over-night it to us at the hotel.  That was my “Should I or Shouldn’t I” moment. I for a split second considered bringing our passports but told myself (who I should NEVER listen to) , “Self, you are only going to Colorado you won’t need them”.

After what seemed like forever we made to Eagle. (I think my driveway is longer than the run way in Eagle but we will save that story for tomorrow).  We got our bags and went to the rental car counter.  As a side, Hubs had 2 tasks for this trip 1) Rent a Car 2) Go to the bank. (He had ONE dollar in his pocket when we left for the airport grrr). He did rent the car, but guess what? They might let you fly without a license, but they sho ain’t gonna let you rent a car without one.  Fine, I will rent a car. But guess what?  I didn’t have a reservation in MY NAME which is DIFFERENT from his name and they couldn’t just cancel his reservation and give me HIS car blah, blah, blah. Still I did not loose my shit.  I simply said “Fine, I will rent a car from a different company”.  Amazing how fast I could then indeed have Hubs car.

Finally! We were on our way to Vail. It took about 20 minutes to get there and about another 2 hours to find the hotel. I was driving, had no idea where I was going and they have those stupid, stupid, roundabouts every where. Still I

To wrap this story up, we finally made it to the hotel and we all lived happily ever after. Until I realized Hubs, who looks all of 15 on a good day could not go to the bar because he would get carded. And that my friends, is when I did finally lose my shit.

** As a side note, I was 100% completely shocked they let him on the plane. I am very thankful for the precautions  T*S*A* took before allowing us through security and feel much safer flying knowing they take their jobs so seriously.


One comment on “Do Not Attempt This At Home

  1. Vixen says:

    Sometimes if you hang on to your shit for too long, then when you can’t no longer hold it anymore and finally lose it….it is….well, messy.

    Ha, ha ha…

    BTW, I mapped it and if we get the gas money together to go to my brother’s we will definitely be stopping by for a visit at your place. Nanny wanted to know if you would be okay if she and the babes came too and I told her it should be no problem, right? I mean, you are my sister from another mother, which makes you her aunt(ish), mkay?

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